:: enorodod
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
hey, i'm making this thread so people can give little tips and maybe give their own experiences about comming out for us guys/gals who aren't sure about how to reveal their alternative sexuality 
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Post: #84263  , Fri 25 May 07, 2:16AM |
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Fistly, make sure that your parents are ok with the gay lifestyle. If they are not, and you still want to tell them, make sure you have a friend that can temporarily house you if the worst happens.
Here’s what I know about the realm of possibility—it is always expanding, it is never what you think it is. Everything around us was once deemed impossible. From the airplane overhead to the phones in our pockets to the choir girl putting her arm around the metalhead. As hard as it is for us to see sometimes, we all exist within the realm of possibility. Most of the limits are of our own world’s devising. And yet, every day we each do so many things that were once impossible to us.
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Post: #84267 , Fri 25 May 07, 2:31AM |
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1) Be sure of yourself ~ self explanatory but make sure your secure with your sexuality and who you are as a person before you come out
2) Try to find some background info about the person your coming out to. Are they gay friendly or homophobic. Have some clue as to who your coming out to?
3) Have a back up plan. As scary as it sounds when coming out to family or parents there are some times when things go horribly wrong. If need be know of somewhere or someone you can go to until things quiet down.
4) If you're going to come out come out completely. If your sure you are gay or lesbian don't say you're bisexual and later come out as gay or lesbian. People might doubt you later that you switched and will just add confusion.
That's all I can think of for now. I'm sure others will have better advice.
Good Luck though
~mike
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Edit: mark_cohen, Fri 25 May 07, 2:35AM
Post: #84268 , Fri 25 May 07, 2:32AM |
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hmmm...
if your unsire of reaction do it through a letter or email to give the person time to think or cool down if need be
have a person you can go to/stay with if things dont go so well
be prepared to answer questions at least a little bit aka be comfortable talking about it
and it would probably be wise to find out a persons view on homosexuality before coming out...even just slip a comment in to a conversation rather casually, or make up a story of homophobia witnessed at skool something like that
much lvoe, and luck to those going for it!
aasha
.:NO REGRETS:.
we.are.all.in.this.together. PERIOD.
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Post: #84284 , Fri 25 May 07, 4:12AM |
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the best thing i can recommend is know ahead of time if the person might respond badly. I've only come out to people I know will be fine with it. once you find those people. you can be ready to have them by your side for the people that might cause problems.
if you know any Unitarian Universalists. go to them, they rock. hec, they fly the rainbow flag outside their churches. hard to miss.
the world is a beachball and it's turtles all the way down.
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Post: #84285 , Fri 25 May 07, 4:13AM |
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:: hl18
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
Sounds obvious but if you're only coming out to a few people make sure you trust them enough that they won't tell people, i thought i did and it turned out i couldn't and now people know who i didn't want to.
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Post: #84315 , Fri 25 May 07, 9:36AM |
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:: foppet1
:: QA10 Community Goddess | |
ALWAYS pick a good time and place and don't let your emotions get the better of you if you're in a situation and just blurt it out. I say this because, when I came out to my mother, it was when she'd unplugged the phone while I was talking to my girlfriend. She started yelling at me that I was on the phone too much. Well, when my mom yells at me, I get frusterated and when I'm frusterated I say things without thinking. She demanded to know who I'd been talking to and I yelled "MY GIRLFRIEND!" and she just stared at me, left for work, came back an hour later because she wanted to "talk" over dinner. Well, we ended up talking about anything but my coming out. I regret losing control of my emotions like that but sometimes I just don't know what to do, ya know?
Again, time, place, keep emotions under control.
"You can lead me by a leash anytime, if you keep looking at me like that" ~ Skye, CLOV
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Post: #84341 , Fri 25 May 07, 2:33PM |
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:: Emserai
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
When actively coming out to someone always actually tell them. Open your mouth and say "I'm gay" or if you're doing it over MSN or similar type "I'm gay".
Sometimes it's ok to talk about your boyfriend/girlfriend but I find it works out best when you say it clearly, leave nothing to doubt and then have an oppurtunity to talk about it afterwards.
Or write a letter if you prefer.
Other tips:
Check their view on homosexuality first.
Tell them to keep quiet if you want them to.
Try to keep calm.
And lastly: It's ok to change your mind!
Come to the edge. We might fall.
Come to the edge. It's too high!
Come to the edge, And they came,
And we pushed, And they flew.
- Christopher Logue
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Post: #84343 , Fri 25 May 07, 2:46PM |
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:: enorodod
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
ok, thanks for the tips guys! 
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Post: #84403 , Sat 26 May 07, 2:39AM |
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:: PIKKLE
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
Well, before I came out to one of my friends, I made then promise not to freak out or to think of me differently. It might not work all the time, but I feel that it helped prepared them for what was coming next.
Sorry, but thats the only piece of advise I can offer 
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Post: #85115 , Thu 31 May 07, 12:21AM |
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