Alright so I'm pretty sure we've all heard the stories of little kids being trans* and that from a young age they knew they we're the opposite gender. Every time I hear these stories I wonder if it means I'm not really trans* because it never occurred to me that I'm the opposite gender until I was much older?
About my childhood (skip to main question if you like)
When I was little I used to want to be like my brother when I grew up, I wore boys clothes and liked to be the boys when we played video games. My brother used to say that I wanted to be a boy and I used to deny it worth my life. Now was this because as far as I knew it wasn't possible for me to be a boy if I was born a girl?
MAIN QUESTION
Can you be trans* if you didn't feel like you were in the wrong body when you were young?
|
|
Post: #675816  , Sun 19 Aug 12, 3:56AM |
|
|
I think so  .
I'm genderqueer now and I never felt that way when I was little so yeah.
To see us dance is to hear our hearts speak- Hopi Indian saying
|
|
Post: #675817 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 3:57AM |
|
|
I can't really speak from experience, but I think it's totally possible. I didn't even realize I was attracted to women at all until the eighth grade (and it would be four more years before I fully came to terms with the fact that I was queer) so I think it's possible to not know your gender identity when you're young. Especially if you're constantly being told you're a girl, it might be hard to imagine yourself as a boy. Even I consider myself a little bit genderqueer and I used to bitch about my sister always making me be the guy in games...although now I think it would be great to be able to be a guy sometimes or at least not as obviously female as I am (sometimes...I still have my very girly moments) Obviously it's not quite the same, but I don't think you should let your past affect your present to much. Think about how you feel now. If you feel that you are trans, in all liklihood you are. Unless you're talking surgery and all that stuff, you can always change your mind later on if you decide you aren't really trans*. There's no rule that says you have to commmit to one gender for life.
|
|
Post: #675818 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 4:03AM |
|
|
This is my biggest pet peeve about how the trans* community is shown in the media/to the public. EVERY single story you hear out there is about someone who identified as the opposite gender and was vocal about from a young age. And yes this is a valid narrative, but it's not everyone's narrative. Granted, I don't even think it's the most common one, it's just what society can deal with right now. It's easier to believe and validate someone's gender identity if it's presented this way and you are a person that's not used to that type of thing.
BUT THE MEDIA DEPICTS TRANS PEOPLE AS THIS HUGE MONOLOTHIC ENTITY THAT IS STRAIGHT AND BINARY AND HAS IDENTIFIED AS WHATEVER GENDER THEY ARE "TRANSITIONING TO" FOREVER AND IT'S NOT TRUE AND IT'S OFF-PUTTING AND IT MAKES ME ANGRY.
Sorry. I had to say that.
Anyhow, I'm someone that doesn't fit the narrative. There was a time in my life when I did identify as a girl. There was a time in my life when I wore dresses and didn't complain about it. Hell, there was a time in my life when I told my mom that I didn't want something because it was too "boyish". Does any of that de-legitimize my transness? Absolutely not. I am male and I have a trans history and I am on testosterone and go by male pronouns and use male bathrooms and couldn't be happier.
We just need to give the world time to catch up with us. If you feel you're trans*, you probably are. Take some time, experiment, etc. Your past doesn't really matter at this point. Every trans* person has a different experience and a different narrative and none of it is more "right" or "true" or "valid" than any other one.
If you want to talk (and I swear I'm not always this crazy and angry and pretentious), I'm more than up to it.
"We have to create. It's the only thing louder than destruction".
|
|
Post: #675820 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 4:10AM |
|
|
|
Honestly, I don't think it matters whether you've always known or if you realised it later on in life. Everyone's story is going to be different so I don't think you should worry too much about whether you're 'trans enough' or not.
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
|
|
Post: #675835 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 5:05AM |
|
|
Definitely. I am one of those people. I didn't have any aspirations to be male in early childhood and I do now, but I can't remember much from back then.
It's similar to discovering that you're gay: some notice at 10, some at 45. Are we going to remove the 45 year old's "gay card" just because they've been in a hetero marriage and only knew later in life? No, we wouldn't -- the same with trans*
A person shall know when they are ready to know. Such information is always there, just takes different times to be discovered
I'm as straight as a rainbow
|
|
Post: #675850 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 7:04AM |
|
|
You can be whoever you want to be. As Gloria Gaynor sung, I am what I am. Just because the feeling hasn't come to light when you were young doesn't mean your not who you think you are.
|
|
Post: #675874 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 1:45PM |
|
|
Amen to everything Codie said. I was going to pretty much say the same thing except not as smart sounding. XD But yeah. The small amount of trans* visibility in the media lacks substance and variety. You're only going to find one narrative unless you hear other the stories of other trans* people, free of media bias and societal perceptions.
Since you were a kid, your mind and your body have grown, your tastes have expanded, and your identity has developed so, so much. Not IDing as trans* as a child has nothing to do with whether or not you identify as such now.
|
|
Post: #675894 , Sun 19 Aug 12, 6:00PM |
|
|
Dying my hair!
Lily Helena Knight
Things that grow
My new life
Trip to the zoo!
As the Sakura Fall #1
Alone
How to know when you like a guy.
![Liz is dancing :). [Avatar]](images/?img=avatars/16504wee.jpg?i=0){kind=small}
![Kai has a job and a rad date to QA prom. Life is fabulous. <3 [Avatar]](images/?img=avatars/11545wee.jpg?i=6){kind=small}
