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For you to consider yourself "100% out", how out do you have to be? Would it be enough for you to just be out with your close friends and family, or would you need to tell everyone you know? This seems like a subjective question that'll change from person to person, so it might be interesting for us to see each other's responses.
"I am reminded of a colleague who reiterated 'all my homosexual patients are quite sick'—to which I finally replied 'so are all my heterosexual patients'." -Ernest van den Haag, psychotherapist
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Post: #667448  , Thu 19 Jul 12, 3:27AM |
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:: Rakkaus
:: QA5 Having the neighbours round | |
Be however out as you want to be or feel you should be...be out for your own sake, not for the sake of others.
I don't make any effort to hide my sexuality, and if the topic comes up I'll happily discuss it, but I've certainly not felt the need to formally 'come out' to everyone I come into contact with. I've come out to people I am close to; but I actually prefer to maintain a shroud of mystery with people I might not know so well.
You are right that this is subjective and some people might feel it necessary to explicitly announce their sexuality to everyone.
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Post: #667452 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 3:45AM |
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I remember talking about this thread idea 
As I've said, just being okay with everyone knowing. At the moment I'm keeping my grandparents and some relatives out of the loop, so I don't consider myself 100% out.
"You're like the Narnia lion of pickle land." ~ Saied <3
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Post: #667455 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 3:59AM |
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Haha yes, some portion of credit goes to Joey for inspiring this thread
So for you to consider yourself 100% out you'd want to at least be out to all your family members, Joey? Seems reasonable.
@Erik, Hmm, so you don't actually come out to anyone unless they ask? Interesting. I'm probably about the same at the moment.
"I am reminded of a colleague who reiterated 'all my homosexual patients are quite sick'—to which I finally replied 'so are all my heterosexual patients'." -Ernest van den Haag, psychotherapist
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Post: #667456 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 4:04AM |
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:: TealSkye
:: QA7 Taking responsibility | |
100% out...
To me, that means your friends and family know, and if a stranger asked, short of it being potentially harmful to your life, and health, you'd tell them too.
I mean really, the breeders don't go around like "Sup bro, so I'm a Redskins fan, I like peaches. I'm straight... ;D" Nahp, I don't remember that no. It'd be funny though.
But to each their own bro. 
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Post: #667459 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 4:11AM |
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If being 100% out means shouting it over the intercom before the morning announcements, and you feel you have to do it, than go for it. But being completely out means you've told who you wanted to tell.
Think before you speak, and speak before your thoughts escape you. |
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Post: #667461 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 4:18AM |
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True, I don't think I'd shout it at people. But I wouldn't hold back my feminine side so much
"You're like the Narnia lion of pickle land." ~ Saied <3
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Post: #667462 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 4:20AM |
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To me being 100% out means that my immediate family (parents, brother) knows, the majority of my friends know, and that I won't deny it if anyone asks. I don't have any issue with my extended family knowing, I just haven't made any special effort to tell them. Half of them have probably guessed it by now anyway...
I'm a ratfish trying to practice doing back flips on your mattress.
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Post: #667572 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 1:59PM |
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I'd just need my family and friends to know (my friends already do). And anyone else can just "find out."
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Post: #667573 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 2:03PM |
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being compleatly out is a personal thing if you tell your friends and family and feel like they are all that matter then yes that would be 100% out
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Post: #667578 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 2:30PM |
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just my friends and family know.to be honest, i'm completely comfortable without anyone knowing. I'm not the type of person who thinks being out is freedom or "being yourself" I think you can be yourself without the world knowing. :/
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Post: #667593 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 3:39PM |
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for me if i'm out to my family and friends.. and can dare to wear LGTB shirt in public . .. it's absolutely 100 percent out.. hehe
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Post: #667595 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 3:41PM |
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:: Patroclus
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
For me I'd say that I consider being 100% out as just admitting you're out when asked and not trying to hide your sexuality. My sexuality is only really relevant if someone is attracted to me, so I don't see why I'd bother to discuss it with someone until it is relevant.
"No man is rich enough to buy back his own past"-Oscar Wilde
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Post: #667623 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 6:16PM |
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:: Tiara
:: QA9 Grand Elder | |
Being out to me just means not ever pretending to be straight. I don't even say that I'm bisexual or pansexual anymore. Usually I'll talk about girls and guys and people just get the hint. If someone asks though, I'll be honest and open.
It's just not a big deal anymore, and that's how I know I'm out.
The only person I'll never be open with is my granddad, but then again my cousin won't even tell my granddad that he's an atheist. We've talked about both telling him, and decided that he's so old that the news would probably give him a heart attack :-/
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Edit: Tiara, Thu 19 Jul 12, 7:44PM
Post: #667642 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 7:43PM |
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If your a 100% out you can act normal at every second of the day. but if you act different regardless of the circumstance you may not be fully out!
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Post: #667693 , Thu 19 Jul 12, 11:54PM |
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Once things are all settled down for the rest of my at-home family I'll be able to be fully out and finally, be myself COMPLETELY.
"You're like the Narnia lion of pickle land." ~ Saied <3
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Post: #667702 , Fri 20 Jul 12, 12:45AM |
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:: zee_to_a
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
Out enough that you feel comfortable enough with yourself and don't have to worry about others opinions. And just be completely happy with yourself.
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Post: #667710 , Fri 20 Jul 12, 2:40AM |
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I think that 100% out would mean that anyone you want to know or people you care about knowing know
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Post: #668602 , Sun 22 Jul 12, 10:51PM |
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I "pass" pretty well as a straight guy, which means that unless I tell someone, they don't know. My family knows (I transitioned, so it was hard for them not to know) and even though I don't tell every person I run into, I consider myself 100% out. The people I spend time with regularly know, and I don't hesitate to talk about it when it seems appropriate. I don't really mind who knows, I just don't find it necessary to walk around and make that my first topic of conversation all the time. Most of the time it's just not relevant to the interaction.
"Your life is your life. Don't let it be clubbed into dank submission." --Charles Bukowski, "The Laughing Heart"
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Post: #668619 , Sun 22 Jul 12, 11:04PM |
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I'd say being able to discuss it openly, and casually talk about who you like with friends, etc. I think if it's just a normal aspect of your life, that's the point you're completely out.
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Post: #669039 , Mon 23 Jul 12, 10:49PM |
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Alone
How to know when you like a guy.
Lez-be-honest
Lily Helena Knight
Things that grow
Just so.
My new life
Trip to the zoo!
