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Topic: How Open Are You?
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:: Ezequiel
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred! | |
I was reading a read recently and the replies to it.
http://www.queerattitude.com/f...sts.php?t=24592
This thread got me thinking, cause the replies were kind of diverse and scattered. Humans are odd, and how they think. So I have a question...
Most of you would deny your sexual orientation, why? I understand if youre recently out, or still "hiding". But for those of you who are out, why do you deny it? And for those of you who are not out, what would it take to just tell anyone? A stranger, friend, family, and why?
Mason.
Love is a battle field; take your time with love. The faster you fall, the harder it is to get up
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Post: #654018  , Mon 4 Jun 12, 3:34PM |
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:: Tiara
:: QA9 Grand Elder | |
Oh if someone asks I won't deny it or pretend to be something I'm not. But it's not a big thing for me anymore. I'll casually bring up that I'm bi/pan if the topic comes up. I'm not hiding, but I'm not screaming it from the rooftops. Most people don't even guess because I'm fairly feminine looking even though I'm genderqueer.
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Post: #654033 , Mon 4 Jun 12, 4:47PM |
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I don't hide it. Don't deny it either. I am a very open book, ask me any personal question and I'll answer honestly. I just don't get embarresed that much 
I'm a Loiner, apparently...
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Post: #654035 , Mon 4 Jun 12, 4:54PM |
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I don't deny anything, it is just I answer queations like, "are you a lesbian" only yes or no with no kindas... but i will answer yes if people ask me if i am bi/pan. Nobody has asked me that, so I am good, probably because I act straight. Nobody asks me if i am genderfluid cuz I act more girly.
I am bi and genderfluid. I like Soul Eater <3
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Edit: samizer0313, Mon 4 Jun 12, 5:53PM
Post: #654045 , Mon 4 Jun 12, 5:52PM |
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:: Kholie36
:: QA7 Taking responsibility | |
Sadly, I used to do that. It was only last year, too. I had just been out for a couple months, and I felt ashamed and scared, and if someone asked me if I was gay I went to great lengths to deny it. In the last few months, though, I've seen a BIG change. I'm prouder, louder, and as a result, I'm so much happier than I've ever been. Seeing myself grow and change and learn to love and accept myself has been an amazing journey for me. Now if anyone asks me if I'm gay, I flash a big grin and say yes.
"That's the best revenge of all: happiness. Nothing drives people crazier than seeing someone have a good fucking life"-Chuck Palahniuk
"A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, Im afraid of widths."-Steven Wright
"One and one is two, and two and two is four, and five will get you ten if you know how to work it."-Mae West
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Post: #654130 , Mon 4 Jun 12, 11:36PM |
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Eh... I'll tell anyone who asks. I'll always tell you the truth (unless you are my parents but they don't count) but you're not always gonna like the answer. To be honest if you're asking me a question you should be prepared for the answer. If you're not prepared then don't ask. Job done  .
To see us dance is to hear our hearts speak- Hopi Indian saying
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Post: #654148 , Tue 5 Jun 12, 12:11AM |
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:: PDQ2
:: QA7 Taking responsibility | |
Basically I'm out to anyone. However, my mom works at a private "Christian" school soooo I basically have to hide the fact that i'm gay when i'm there or see teachers outside of there..
I am gay, straight, bisexual, lesbian, transgender... I am a person.
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Post: #654158 , Tue 5 Jun 12, 12:39AM |
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I don't feel like my sexuality should have to be something I shout to the world, or even something I just bring up randomly when no one asked. If anyone ever asks me (which I'm kind of hoping will happen soon...), I'll tell them I'm gay, but otherwise I just don't feel like it should be said. (Not because it's wrong or because I'm ashamed - it's totally the opposite - I just can't imagine myself randomly going up to a friend and being like... hey, just thought you should know, I'm gay.)
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Post: #654408 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 12:49AM |
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Fairly open. If somebody asks, I tell. I don't flaunt it though.
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Post: #654411 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 12:51AM |
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I only deny around my family.
but with my friends, I'm all out.
and I think I sort of flaunt it sometimes, if I'm in a good mood and feeling extra gay.
c:
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Post: #654438 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 2:30AM |
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:: Inch
:: QA6 Livin' it up! | |
I'm not out at this point, mostly because I'm still coming to terms with it myself. I like to think that I'd say, "yes." But, to be honest, I'd probably say that I'm just trying to figure things out.
I have been considering getting a rainbow wristband recently, though. Just wear it around for a few weeks, see what reactions I get x3
I will never be afraid again
I will keep on fighting 'till the end
I can walk on water
I can fly
I will keep on fighting 'till I die
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Post: #654442 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 2:40AM |
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If I know it will cause an issue (crazy chiropractor, parents old church friends etc.) I tend to dance around the subject, but these are people I really don't like as it is. With other people, if it comes up in conversation or if it is asked, I answer honestly, usually in an interesting way such as "well they say that you are what you eat, and I love mangoes, so I guess I am quite the fruit." I generally don't just run around and announce it though; I make sure friends know so it isn't some weird shock one day if they see me with a guy and think they have to hide that they saw it or some such scenario. On particularly "gay days" when we are training a new girl at work I have been known to say "I have been here forever so if you need anything just ask, I don't bite... women!"
But I do have a special exception. My grandmother on my father's side has been kept in the dark. It isn't because I think she would handle it poorly, in fact she is the person who I think would be most supportive (aside from one of my sisters who is very supportive), she even had an old high school friend who was F to M transgendered until he died probably a decade ago (she always joked that he went in for an appendectomy and got an "addadicktome"). I am not sure how her husband would handle it. Her previous husband, which we were all very close to died 8 years ago. I know HE would have handled it well, he even used to play a board game where you wear plastic jewelry with me all the time called "Pretty Pretty Princess." The current husband however, I know nearly nothing about and I couldn't live with myself if I caused any strain between them while she is in her 90's. So that is a very specific one I am not open to and I think it is not a ridiculous exception to make.
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Post: #654486 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 6:43AM |
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I'm actually pretty open, but I don't just say, "Hi, I'm Irene nice to meet you. I like cats, dogs, anime, KPop, Jpop and I'm a lesbian." Hm, nah. If they ask, I don't deny. I like to see how long it takes them to figure it out though. It's sort of fun sometimes, haha
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Post: #654488 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 6:56AM |
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I'm so out I shout in the hallways at school "I AM THE LIVING RAINBOW!" 
Yep. Very out. And proud. 
What a privilege to be here on the planet to contribute your unique donation to humankind. Each face in the rainbow of colors that populate our world is precious and special.
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Edit: Whitney, Wed 6 Jun 12, 7:24AM
Post: #654499 , Wed 6 Jun 12, 7:24AM |
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:: Rhee
:: QA6 Livin' it up! | |
I don't know. Moderately open? I guess I'm still working on where exactly the balancing line is between unnecessarily mentioning it and not telling people. If someone asks I'd certainly tell them (at least for being not straight; I think if someone asked me if I wasn't female I might say I was just because I would be so surprised and not expecting it XD).
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Post: #654661 , Thu 7 Jun 12, 2:00AM |
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Yeah, If it comes up, I'll definitely mention it, or if I get a girlfriend, I'll mention that, but I won't bring it up in conversation. I also won't go running around telling it to people for no reason. And, if someone asks me, I won't lie, but, yeah, like I said, I'm not one to just mention it or anything.
I Love You... All of You
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Post: #654673 , Thu 7 Jun 12, 3:50AM |
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Personally, I am not very open because I'm not out to my parents. I just can't afford to be: I seriously need a place to stay for the summers in between the next four years of college! Plus, my mom has agreed to help pay for food.
I can understand why others are not so open, though. I think after being in the closet for so long, it takes a while to become accustomed to being more open. It makes sense: most of us are in the closet for years, it's going to take some time to open up!
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Post: #654674 , Thu 7 Jun 12, 4:15AM |
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I came out to one friend a few months ago then another then another but one of them let it slip and now like 20 people know =/
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Post: #654708 , Thu 7 Jun 12, 6:38AM |
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I don't deny it, but I don't feel the need to tell everyone. When I get asked "do you have a girlfriend?" I tell them.
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Post: #654722 , Thu 7 Jun 12, 11:25AM |
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:: Raven
:: QA3 Getting cosy | |
I only mention it is asked. I don't deny, but I don't shout from the rooftops either!
I'd not feel comfortable being any more open than I am right now, because I think that it can make people uncomfortable especially my hetero female friends. I don't know any other lesbians - literally 0. I'm also going through a period of being confused about my own identity lately
I would like to be more sure and more open
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Post: #654726 , Thu 7 Jun 12, 11:48AM |
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