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Topic: 'She's gay, so she must be an alright person'
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I was talking to my friend today because he's trying to fix me up with a girl he met at the gym. I asked him what she's like, and he said 'she's gay so she must be alright' and I was speechless. How do you respond to this? Where is the reason?
I mean, I know it's nice to think that all LGBT people are lovely and carry rainbows in their pockets and all that because we are accepting and whatnot, but I've met some pretty bitchy lesbians and some pretty cocky gay guys. Having said that, I also know a lot of beautiful LgBT folk.
Have you ever come across this lgbt/nice association? do you think it's real? To me, a personality is independent of their sexuality, but at the same time I know that that's not entirely true. Thoughts?
And then there's the whole issue of 'you're only saying that because I'm gay' which seriously riles me if it's completely unrelated...
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Post: #642400  , Mon 23 Apr 12, 8:47AM |
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A person is definitely independent from their personality. The only bit of them which will likely be directly influenced by their sexuality will be the fact that they are most likely a bit more open minded. But this might be only and open mindedness when it comes to sexuality. Everything else is subject to the same influences as if they were straight. There are plenty of queer assholes. I have met a few. So your friend is reverse discriminating. Never mind the fact that he thought you two might be compatible just because you were both gay. That's not quite how a relationship works.
That said, I do find that being open minded about one thing, can lead to being more open minded about other things, because you try to understand other people since you want to be understood in return. And once you start to try to be more understanding, you might change your personality for the better. So I can see how the LGBT community got the stereotype it did. Regardless, it shouldn't be used to judge people's character before you know them.
La clarté étrange de ton sourire illumine mon été.
I wish I were a glow worm, a glow worm's never glum. 'Cause how can you be grumpy when the sun shines out your bum?
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Post: #642409 , Mon 23 Apr 12, 9:27AM |
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Yeah, I like your point about the open-mindedness being stretched out into bigger things, but I still don't really know what to make of the whole exchange... Yeah, it's reverse discriminating, but I don't know if it's because thTs what is politically correct so as not to seem homophobic, or if it's just general stereotype that LGBT are 'nicer'? Gargh such a weird thing to think about!! 
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Post: #642463 , Mon 23 Apr 12, 1:50PM |
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YAY! A positive generalisation!
Obviously not every GSM person is 'an alright person', but in my experience we do tend to be a bit more... thoughtful(?) on the whole.
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Post: #642492 , Mon 23 Apr 12, 4:24PM |
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AHHH! I hear this ALL the time!
"Well, I don't see why you wouldn't like him. You're gay, he's gay, GET IN THERE!"
err...maybe because many gay guys I have met around here are total dickheads.
Sorry, personal rant.
Anywhoo..
It is something I hear frequently and to be quite frank it pisses me off. What you said is so true - if everyone were happy unicorns then there wouldn't be any relationship problems.
The First, Last and Only thing I will ever say...Never give up hope, Always believe and Hold onto your dreams...♥
The Never-Ending Maze of Surprises...
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Post: #642516 , Mon 23 Apr 12, 5:34PM |
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Heh, my flatmates said that to me not so long ago. Apparently there's only one other gay person at the (very small) university I'm at, and when this came up in conversation they assumed I'd like her because of it... Doesn't quite work like that, despite what most people seem to think. Still, gotta hand it to them for trying.
I'm a ratfish trying to practice doing back flips on your mattress.
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Post: #642529 , Mon 23 Apr 12, 7:05PM |
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:: Xeffy
:: QA9 Grand Elder | |
I feel like I've had this exact disscussion on here before.
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Post: #642549 , Mon 23 Apr 12, 8:07PM |
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Emma, I guess we can e more thoughtful but it doesn't necessarily mean good person. Just the same as someone who's parent committd suicide or someone who has red-hair, I think we're seen like that because it's the overcoming of somethig, not necessarily good or bad.
Xeff, I'm sorry for creating a sense of déjà vu!!
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Post: #642864 , Tue 24 Apr 12, 7:23AM |
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And Al, I guess you're right about the effort counting 
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Post: #642865 , Tue 24 Apr 12, 7:24AM |
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