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Mainpage QA Forums Queer Thinking Topic: Do you think Gay/Lesbian couples last longer...

Topic: Do you think Gay/Lesbian couples last longer...

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:: atn_43
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred!
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than straight ones in relationships/marriages?


I searched all over the forums and couldn't find anything on this.

So what are you views on gay and lesbian relationships versus straight ones? Do you think they last longer? Why? Emoticon: Smile :)

To me, it seems like they last longer than straight ones (but then again, it really depends on the people). I remember reading somewhere that there have been some studies on gay/lesbian marriages where there were less divorces than straight ones (even if there are too little gay/lesbian marriages compared to straight ones).

I also found this link :]
http://lesbianlife.about.com/o...nflictStudy.htm
 New Window


Emoticon: Grin :D
  Post: #386061 Link to this post, Sun 9 May 10, 1:37AM
:: Aquatom95
:: QA10 Community God
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I don't think that gay relationships last longer. I know a couple friends (not saying any names) that had short relationships with the same sex. But I would agree that same-sex marriages are more successful than straight marriages. Seeing as we don't get many benefits through marriage, it's much more likely that the couple's marrying truly for love. And seeing as there's much less of us than there are straights, we're more likely to marry someone we really love. Idk if that last sentence makes sense but it does to me Emoticon: Smile :)
I'm here, I'm queer and I'm here to...idk...steer?...peer...fear...near...I'll figure out something later.
  Post: #386070 Link to this post, Sun 9 May 10, 2:14AM
:: CandySock
:: QA7 Taking responsibility
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That topic is very interesting. I didn't know that anyone would do research on relationships. Let alone for 12 years. interesting. :3

Weell...I think some same sex couples may last longer than heterosexual ones after reading that article. I think its true that women are actually raised and pretty much expected to be able to communicate their feelings more which makes a relationship easier. I'm not a gay man, so I don't know about that side of the spectrum. :3
Then again, I can see how it would vary from person to person. Maybe straight couples just seem to have more problems because there's just more of them. Who knows. It's probably all depending on the people, though.
  Post: #386072 Link to this post, Sun 9 May 10, 2:20AM
:: Alastair
:: QA5 Having the neighbours round
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In general, i think homosexual couples last longer simply because its easier to identify with someone of the same gender that has similar characteristics as yourself. There have been a lot of research on this (not specifically LGBT community, but relationships in general) that states that the longest relationships are the ones which both people are quite similar. although there is a bunch of other factors like socioeconomic status, race, ethnicity, values, morals, family, money, distance etc. that all affect how a couple works as a dynamic unit, i think being the same gender is a big factor in how a relationship would operate

It would be interesting to see some actual studies done on the LGBT community though
Love is like a butterfly, the more you pursue it the more it eludes you, but if you are calm and still it will land on you shoulder.
  Post: #386336 Link to this post, Sun 9 May 10, 9:47PM
:: thefuzz
:: QA9 Grand Elder
I did read one study that talked primarily about how power-sharing is usually better in gay/lesbian relationships.

I don't think anyone has done a study on gay marriage rates and whatnot, though! However, I can see them being better. It is often much harder to marry if you are a same-sex couple (gotta find the right state and/or country first!). So, it follows that gay/lesbian couples may be more committed on average. But ultimately I think gay couples can be just as suspectible as straight ones to falling out of love, changing, cheating, etc.
  Post: #386340 Link to this post, Sun 9 May 10, 9:58PM
:: Talsky
:: QA8 High Householder
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I wouldn't say gay/lesbian relationships last longer. It really depends on the people. There's just as many gay players who just want a quick, week or two long relationship as there are straight.
But I don think it's interesting about the divorce rates. As gay marriage becomes legalized in more areas, it'd be an interesting statistic to keep watch on.
"I won't scream in my head and let it isolate me. I won't be left dancing alone to songs from the past."
Tegan and Sara
  Post: #425102 Link to this post, Thu 16 Sep 10, 4:14AM
:: richie101
:: QA4 A spot of tea please, Alfred!
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i believe that same sex couples last longer not because their simply same-sex (although that definitely helps!) but because they suffer to be together for the most part.if straight couples had to fight simply to be together then maybe they would last a tiny bit longer.
if love is the cliff on which humanity stands on,then hate is the sea that surrounds us on all sides.
  Post: #425225 Link to this post, Thu 16 Sep 10, 11:11PM
:: MSF94
:: QA6 Livin' it up!
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Perhaps gay and lesbian couples do last longer maybe not we just hear more about the straight population because they are 90% and were only 10% we never know.
You must be the change you want to see in the world. - Gandhi
  Post: #425243 Link to this post, Fri 17 Sep 10, 12:20AM
:: cheesecake22
:: QA10 Community Goddess
Lisa is happy, indefinitely [Avatar]
I don't think anyone could conclusively say that gay/lesbian couples last longer, or that straight ones do. But the topic fascinates me as a psychology lover. :]

I've read some studies that focused on LGB Parenting but had a subcategory discussing same-sex couples and power-sharing, as someone stated above, and the differences in those couples when compared with heterosexual couples equal in all other values. (Unbiased testing, you know.) The research definitely leaned toward same-sex couples of either sex as sharing duties and communicating through problems more equally. (I'm trying not to mis-paraphrase, here, excuse me.)

From personal experience, I'd say that similar people definitely do have an easier time staying together. Differences in morals, money management, lifestyle, and religion can be major contention points in a long term relationship. Now, that doesn't directly correlate to gender. I wouldn't place gender as the highest factor determining relationships, I'd say honesty, trust, and communication are right up there after actually loving the person (and staying in love with them). Fighting is one thing, every couple does it, but the couples that are bound to make it longer are those that don't fight constantly and know how to communicate after/during a fight to work things out in favor of both parties (compromise, not manipulation).

It is interesting to point out that in my experience, looking at couples who've always had it easy (no major problems keeping them apart) and those who've had it hard (one large problem or multiple keeping them apart), is that couples who face many obstacles together and overcome them seem to fare better. Because life is bound to throw these things at anyone, and couples that have shown time and time again that they face things together and keep living are showing strong relationship qualities.
You're stubborn, hard headed, sheltered, impatient, angry, and altogether you irritate and frustrate me more than anyone else on the planet. I love you.
  Post: #425249 Link to this post, Fri 17 Sep 10, 12:43AM
:: ironicbrat187
:: QA1 Just in
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I'm bisexual, but I can only see myself marrying a woman. Weird, huh?

I think its been ingrained into my brain that gay couples last longer than straight ones -- I don't think it's *true*, but it's just an innate belief.
"There's no such thing as tragedy -- I can't resent what's meant to be."
  Post: #425257 Link to this post, Fri 17 Sep 10, 1:05AM
:: DentArthurDent
:: QA3 Getting cosy
I'd say that gay marriages would last longer than straight ones, as the only reason for gay people to get married is for love, whereas straight people have societal pressure to get married as they feel that it is required for a normal life.
I sit in my cubicle, here on the motherworld.
When I die, they will put my body in a box and
dispose of it in the cold ground.
And in all the million ages to come, I will never
breathe or laugh or twitch again.
So won't you run and play with me here among the
teeming mass of humanity?
The universe has spared us this moment.
  Post: #445007 Link to this post, Sun 12 Dec 10, 1:53AM
:: sukisyokitty
:: QA10 Community Goddess
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I think that relationships can last any length no matter what combination of genders they are - it depends on the people in them and their compatability =)
"It's better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you're not"
~ Kurt Cobain
  Post: #445016 Link to this post, Sun 12 Dec 10, 2:04AM
:: queenbillblue
:: QA3 Getting cosy
i agree with jez but i would like to think gay couples last longer, because since i want to be with another woman i'd like to think we'd have more than average chance of a successful relationship
love is love .. simple as
  Post: #445041 Link to this post, Sun 12 Dec 10, 2:31AM
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