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Blog Entry: What the fuck.
Entry
What the fuck.
Haven't blogged in awhile so I figured now is a good time.
My parents.
I don't even know where to start. At my last therapy session my dad came into it to and I got to talk to her the last 15 minutes. As soon as my dad left she was like I know what you are saying about your parents being unaccepting etc. about being gay.
So this morning I have this pin on my back pack and it says "I love men", Laila got it for me at Pride(that my parents didn't let me go to) and this morning my mom was like WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS DOING ON HERE and then ripped it off. And today I come home after almost getting into a fucking car accident and my mom is like I wrote somethings down so I can say them differently. So I'm like okay..
So first off she says that the pin is "raunchy" because when people look at it they think sex. That it is disrespectful for me and the family and everyone else. Then I'm like how is it disrespectful for me or the family and she was like when people throw bricks through the window and paint things on the walls that it's disrespecting them.
Meanwhile I'm here interrupting trying to fucking argue how homophobic she is being.
Then she gets up and starts crying and was all like I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE and then she left. And now she picked my dad up to talk.
WHAT THE FUCK. What the hell am I supposed to say when she says those things to me? And am I wrong in her being blatantly homophobic.
Okay and Iread the list she made about what she wanted to say to me..
-w/ sexuality comes responsibility
Adult, PRIVATE MATTER
Is this working for you?
We have no control over others just ourselves
2% pop is gay, I know you think different.
Stability. I dont want to *cant read* life for you that is why I took the pin away.
First off, I'm not spiderman. I know I have responsibility. Im not stupid.
Is this working for you? UHM WTF
I know that, good thing I dont care what other people thing
I KNOW 2% IS GAY.
Stability?
what kind of fucking excuse is that.
views: 3785 responses: 16 posted by jdg369 on Thursday 2 October 2008 at 10:29PM
BlogResponse
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:: jdg369
:: QA10 Community God | |
forgot to mention I almost killed us driving today cause I'm such a fuck up
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Post: #183379  , Fri 3 Oct 08, 1:50AM |
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Aw... that's horrible. And yes she is OBVIOUSLY homophobic.
Isn't it 10% of the pop is gay? I'm confused...
I love who I am now. I just wish that everyone else did too.
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Post: #183397 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 3:43AM |
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Yeah, it's 10%
Awww, that sucks that that happened! It must be terrible, having to put up with that...
...but prostitution was definitely involved...
You're awful, I love you.
I hate everything about you.
Why do I love you?
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Post: #183400 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 3:44AM |
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Geez, that's sucks, she's really homophobic. I hope she either cools down or you can make plans to move out or something.
Btw, I have a very hard time believing that 10% of the population is gay. I'd say it's more like 6-7% LBGTQ, so that would probably amount to 2% homosexual men, the rest being women, bisexual, trans, etc.
If I dared to let you see the truth behind the person that you imagine me to be, would your arms be open, or would you walk away? Would the love of Jesus be enough to make you stay? -- Stained Glass Masquerade
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Post: #183440 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 1:52PM |
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I thought it was 10%?
And that's... argh. I'm sorry about them. I'm just happy it's only my Dad who is that stupid. He still thinks every single gay person is promiscuous and that all gay men have AIDS.
No offense, I have to be blunt, your Mum sucks.
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Post: #183451 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 4:09PM |
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People say it's 10%. There's no way in hell it's actually 10%. Your mother is closer when she says 2%.
Here’s what I know about the realm of possibility—it is always expanding, it is never what you think it is. Everything around us was once deemed impossible. From the airplane overhead to the phones in our pockets to the choir girl putting her arm around the metalhead. As hard as it is for us to see sometimes, we all exist within the realm of possibility. Most of the limits are of our own world’s devising. And yet, every day we each do so many things that were once impossible to us.
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Post: #183467 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 6:26PM |
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:: sudo
:: QA10 Community God | |
^ Someone get a pitchfork...
Over the rainbow it's not quite right
I saw a man with a face like a dog
At the traffic lights, howling at the sun.
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Post: #183515 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 7:45PM |
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Is it 2% that identify or 2% actually? And what is "gay?" Like... if you have bi tendencies do you count?
I just don't understand how you can put a percentage on a group of people that not only are half in the closet their whole life anyway but also have no definitive "definition." It all seems very subjective to me.
Does anyone else agree?
“What is straight? A line can be straight, or a street, but the human heart, oh, no, it's curved like a road through mountains.”
--Tennessee Williams
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Post: #183548 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:09PM |
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:: sudo
:: QA10 Community God | |
I do. ^
Over the rainbow it's not quite right
I saw a man with a face like a dog
At the traffic lights, howling at the sun.
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Post: #183562 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:16PM |
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^ Totally.
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Post: #183563 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:16PM |
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:: jdg369
:: QA10 Community God | |
Who cares how many people are gay?
To be perfectly honest, I don't. It certainly doesn't change the way I see things
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Post: #183568 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:20PM |
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^ yes, I agree all the way.
And it sucks that your parents are so homophobic. And it's sad that they won't let you talk.
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Post: #183571 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:24PM |
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It seems every other study publishes a new percentage. I think the point is that sexual orientation seems to transcend culture and race and sex and geography and history. It seems to something fundamental about people at-large, perhaps even fundamental about animals in general.
Anyway, biology/psychology aside.
When some horrible drama with my parents come up about this (or even something else), I try my best to focus on what I want the outcome to be:
- me + parents are still together
- parents still love me
- parents still support me
- I still happy
And then I proceed to figuring out what to do. And sometimes, an important ingredient is just time. Sometimes loooots of time (which sucks).
Your mom certainly sounds homophobic or whatever, and it's not nice and you're upset and justifiably so. And it's all wtf and wth. It sounds like your mom sucks, but being pissed off might not be the best way to get to those outcomes of still having a relationship with parents.
Often for me, it felt like I had to be the parents (which I'm totally not prepared for) when it came to sexual identity because my parents had such mixed up and ridiculous notions of what gay meant. Worse still is that they're convinced they're correct because they're older, more experienced, and whatever. And it feels unfair that I can't get pissed off as I know it won't help the situation while my parents rant on about personal safety this and AIDS that. Sometimes parents have to vent too, you know?
It sounds like your mom doesn't know how to handle this. Maybe she needs space. Maybe she needs conversation. Maybe she needs to talk to dad. Maybe she needs to talk to someone who knows something about sexuality. Maybe, maybe, maybe..
What helped me was that I kept putting myself in my parents shoes. It helped me understand how they could be so upset about it, how unfair they could act about me being gay, and how blind they were that I was telling them a truth and that I needed their support. It sucks, but it's what we've got as children of parents who struggle to accept that part of us. So we have to work with what we've got.
"No one has ever said that life is to be easy. Only that it is to be lived." - Grandmother in "The Road to Rankin's Point" by Alistair Macleod
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Post: #183572 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:24PM |
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"Worse still is that they're convinced they're correct because they're older, more experienced, and whatever."
I feel your pain over this issue. My mom keeps on telling me "how much more she knows about this than I do" and how "I'm so young and she's lived so much longer than me"... Argh!!
If I dared to let you see the truth behind the person that you imagine me to be, would your arms be open, or would you walk away? Would the love of Jesus be enough to make you stay? -- Stained Glass Masquerade
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Post: #183582 , Fri 3 Oct 08, 8:30PM |
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Justin, that really sucks. I am so sorry about all of that. You obviously are the biggest person in your family. If all your mom can do is pull out stabilty, then you are so not being heard. I just hope she comes to her senses before she ruins any chance of a mother-son relationship for the two of you.
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Post: #184604 , Wed 8 Oct 08, 11:13PM |
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