Blog Entry: My lowest point

My lowest point So, heres the thing. I had been using too many drugs in too short of a time span. I leeched all the saratonin from my brain. I t made me down to a point I have never been before. I got out of the hospital Tuesday at 3pm. I was admitted Saturday around 6am. I had gone to a friends house after my roomate Mas got off of work. It was just gonna be a relaxed night with a few beers. that's where I went wrong. I thought a few beers wouldn't affect me the way that they did. I drank three beers and a couple swallows of beermonade (beer, vodka, lemonade). I proceeded to have fits of crying. It was due to having so many people so upset with me. My good friend hates me. I had people wanting to jump me. I don't even know what I did to make this all happen. I left my friends house cuz I was ruining it for everyone. I was no fun. When I got home I found a new low. I was so far down that when i look back on it now I wonder who that person was. I wonder how I could have made the decisions i made. It ended up with me taking a whole bottle (170+ pills) of tylenol 500mg. My roomates caught on and my mom came to get me to go to the hospital. I tried to end my life that night. I don't remember much from the hospital. I vaguely remember having to drink a liquid form of charcoal to flush the pills out of my system. I was saying it was a triceratops. Specifically Sara from The Land Before Time. I woke up a few hours later in the Intensive Care Unit. My entire body felt fuzzy and obscure. I told the nurse it was like my brain was there but my body wasn't. she told me it was that my body was there but my brain wasn't. I spent two days in the ICU. After that I was moved to the Behavioral Health Center. I stayed there until I was released from the hospital. The pyschiatrist said I had adjustment issues and that why I snapped. After all of this has happened I feel like I have a new perspective on life. the world seems more vibrant to me now. I see things for what they are. I have a new appreciation and grattitude about everything in my life. I realized that even though it may seem like thats the only out ther are so many other ways to handle it. I just wanted to tell you all my story and hope you might be able to learn from my mistakes if you have to. thanks for being here QA. You don't know how much it means to me. <3